I feel anxious today.  Over the last couple of years I learned to cope well with my progressive lung disease.  I was fortunate enough to participate in an excellent pulmonary rehab program, twice even, at Mount Sinai Hospital.  The program teaches people coping skills for living well with lung diseases.  They are brilliant at what they do.  I learned how to control my breathing in all kinds of situations, how to stay fit, how to keep stress at bay.  You also learn how to manage your individualized action plan.  The plan provides you with the antibiotics and other drugs you need to fight off infections and other problems, when you need them, without having to make an appointment to see the doctor.  This saves time and keeps people from having to go to the hospital needlessly.

I was comfortable with my life.  I knew where my illness was going to take me but I felt good all in all.  My wife and I were enjoying every moment together, fully.

A little over a month ago a question I asked about radical treatment options led to the discovery that I was indeed a potential candidate for lung transplant surgery.  My reading and research over the last couple of years had led me to believe that someone with emphysema could not qualify for a lung transplant.  Well, that was incorrect and all of a sudden I had hope of a longer life, an active life.   I embraced the idea wholeheartedly as did Nicole, her a little quicker than I.  It took her a millisecond to decide a potential miracle was at hand and she wanted to grab it.   I needed a day to think about all of the possible known consequences before I was sure it was what I wanted to do, try to do.

Somewhere between April 22nd and April 26th I will know the results of the PET scan I am going to have on April 17.  I will know if I am going to Notre Dame Hospital to try to get new lungs or to the Jewish General Hospital for lung cancer treatment.

For the next couple of weeks I will practice the breathing exercises, nibble the medicinal cookies, play with my two kittens, hug Nicole often and hang out on google + and with the help of Alice, learn how to blog.